Monday, April 18, 2011

Nepali weddings

                                  
                                                       A Nepali Arranged Marriage


              Marriage is the intersection of intimacy, economic and kin ties, and evolving gender, roles and transforming cultural practices on local, national, and global levels.Different types of people in the world practices different marriage system according to their own culture and traditions.In a traditional Hindu society marriages  are religiously, socially and economically oriented and are generally arranged by the elders.
           Mostly Nepali wedding are arranged and are fixed by the parents or the relatives rather than persons getting wedded. Mostly in Nepal, match could be selected by parents, priest, relatives, and trusted third parties and also through matrimonial sites. Factors that are considered for match making in Nepal are caste, religions, ages, economic status, education profession of bride and groom and same first language, following the same culture and traditions. Among these all reason caste or tribe is considered as the main factor for selecting the matches.Since Nepal is the country inhabited by different tribes and castes of people and all the Nepalese people believe in cultural values and traditional norms. So most of them perform arranged marriages in order to follow and preserve their traditional value and cultures. Still more than 70 percent of Nepalese people practices arrange marriage in the country.
          In Nepal marriage involves a great deal of gender-specific rituals that hold both religious and cultural meanings and symbols.The main celebration of weddings is done in the bride's house,so all the friends and relatives of the groom those who are invited in the wedding takes the groom to the bride's house and wedding is done there along with religious rituals by the priest. Nepalese bride wear red color clothes in her weddings and dating is not allowed before the marriage in Nepal. 
          One of the main event of Nepali weddings is that in the wedding ceremony groom puts the pinch of red color powder in the bride's forehead which means she is married.So it is a cultural belief and norms that a Nepali lady puts red color powder in her forehead everyday  after her marriage.It symbolizes that she is married and shows the respect towards her husband.Only the widow does not put red color.Entering the bride into the groom’s house is a significant ritual, the bride enters the house by stepping on the earthen lamps and rice grains that line the main entrance to the house. Her arrivals to the groom’s house symbolize the entering of the goddess Laxmi.
         There are many advantages and disadvantages of arranged marriages as well. One advantages of Nepali arrange marriage is that mostly the bride and groom comes from the similar background and therefore share the similar views of marriage and family so the chance of getting divorce due to irreconcilable differences is not as strong as western culture. According to statistic report of 2007, the divorce rate of Nepal was just 2% while in America divorce rate was 50% of the total weddings. I was surprised to see this vast differences and sometimes I wonder myself why there is such a vast differences?At the same time there are many disadvantages of arranged marriage as well.In arrange marriage  love takes second priority.Love takes the second priority in the arrange marriage because it is more important to consider social, cultural and economic viability of the marriage rather than the putting romantic love at the forefront.We see that most of the arrange marriage is successful because when it is arranged, the parents support the relationship and they try their best to keep the relationship live as it is their responsibility too.



                  Arrange marriage is good and beneficial if they are not forced but sometimes there is forced match making which could be harmful for the both parties involved. So for the argument shake why don’t we look at the both sides of the coin? Perhaps there may be advantages and disadvantages of arrange marriage, it depend on the person’s cultural upbringing and religious and cultural beliefs and their living habits as well. Arrange marriage is good as well as bad also depending upon the situation.Today With change in  time Nepal’s, wedding system has been changed and turned more into love-arranged marriage which moves towards more shared decision making patterns between parents and children.